Initiation

Been silent for a while, while I studied for a final exam and then processed an initiation.  The first time I’ve ever been initiated into anything, so had nothing to compare it to.  I thought at the time that this was what an initiate of the Eleusinian Mysteries must have felt like.  I can’t even find words for it.  I also don’t think I knew how difficult this was going to be, emotionally, personally ... like going through a ... I don’t know – being melted, re-formed, facing parts of me I hadn’t particularly expected (or wanted) to face, mixed with an uncontrollable urge (now that I faced them) to get rid of them.  And then I also feel that, as difficult as parts of this year were, they were nothing.  The real work starts now.  Ordered the next year’s textbook.

Note to self:  was given a ring to wear ... well, I should preface that by saying that this was in the first part of the initiation, during a – I forgot already what she called it – a journey precipitated by shamanic drumming.  Emerald, a merkaba, surrounded by diamonds – it was beautiful.  Was given something to drink.  Was covered with a ... something? ... I could still see through it, but it was blurry ... and gently turned to face all directions.  Was greeted one by one by a circle of beings.  Sekhmet roared and I felt a blast of heat from her fiery breath. 

It was extraordinarily difficult to return from that trance state – in fact, I found myself slightly irritated, by being asked to leave it.  I had nothing to write this down with – not that I could have at the time, I just wish I would have recorded this immediately, rather than later.  So while I try to process THAT experience ...

... Mr. Signpost did it again – reminded me to get back to work on things I had let drift after chaos erupted – this is one of the sigils he made.  I liked the idea of gluing it onto leather on a stained board – looks so artistic!  Mine looks like a 3-year old drew it with her Crayola crayon set – which I basically did...!!  (And no, I’m not going to post a photo of THAT effort – it’s downright pitiful.)

Recently we had a series of thunderstorms pass through; one hit around 3:30 or 4 on a Saturday afternoon.  There was one bolt of lightening that had to have hit the house or a tree just west of me.  A brilliant flash and a sonic boom simultaneously – I’ve never heard anything that loud during a thunderstorm in a long, long time.  Almost dove under the bed – something of a skull crushing problem when one owns a platform bed – but I’m amazed we didn’t lose power when that happened.

The few times when I’ve had no errands, I’ve been spending 2 hours on the nearly deserted, gloriously sunny beach.  So THIS is what it’s like when the “Summer People” disappear after Labor Day.  It was heavenly,  I could see myself doing this all year, even in a winter coat – just loving the sunshine, and the sound of the waves crashing on the shoreline.