Day of the Lobster, More Stupid Women and the Corn Moon

So this week, I went back to the beach for another two hours, in another weekly attempt to strengthen my core ... except this time I had a beach chair!  I experienced another roller where I got knocked down by a wave and rolled around in the foam before getting my bearings again, and all of my muscles felt the force of it the next day.  The only other difference was the time – rather than 8-10am, I ran a little late, stayed only a half hour longer and was there from 9-11:30am.

By the time I got home?  I looked like a lobster.  Lay most of the afternoon under a soothing high thread count sheet, teeth chattering, moaning, thinking:  oh, KMN.

I did learn that the same Vitamin E oil that I had on hand to minimize my head scar I incurred a week before my brother’s death worked well on sunburn, so I am now slipping and sliding around in my (now) oily chair, hoping the oil soothes this killer sunburn.  My scar responded better to patchouli oil, by the way, which I have no intention of spreading all over myself ... while I love the scent of patchouli in small doses ... the stuff is too precious to use as a body lotion, and I would probably choke the cat – and maybe even myself - with the fragrant overkill.

I also learned that women are just as empty-headed, narcissistic and mentally unhinged on the beach as they are on the commuter rail.  Within the span of those 2.5 hours, I witnessed idiot women ignoring the beauty of the ocean at their feet while they babbled loudly and maniacally on their cell phones, I suffered through not one but TWO idiot women positioning their idiot selves upwind of everyone else and then proceeding to spray themselves – therefore asphyxiating all the men, women, infants and children downwind of them - with toxic waves of aerosol sunscreen (LEARN TO DO THAT IN THE PARKING LOT, YOU STUPID NIMRODS!!!), and I watched a gaggle of seriously demented women thinking it was cute when their demonic and sadistic spawn chased down seagulls with plastic baseball bats – fortunately, I wasn’t the only person who yelled at them, so there is hope for humanity yet ... maybe.  (Also fortunately, no seagulls were injured due to these women’s complete and utter lack of parenting skills).  The rest of them babbled never-ending bullsh*t at each other in such high, squeaky, loud voices you wanted to muzzle each and every one of them.  Give me a roll of duct tape and next time I might just do it.

And that experience ought to teach me not to oversleep on the mornings I plan to visit the beach.  Last time, I had left before these jackasses showed up.  And before I looked like a lobster.

We’re in the middle of Metageitnion Aug 6 - Sep 4 (no, do not ask me to pronounce that), which I’m guessing runs from new moon to new moon, which Drew Campbell tells me are considered sacred – in Hellenic Reconstruction circles, so I’m assuming in ancient Greece as well.*  The Corn Moon on the 20th (more or less) was magnificent.

(*And once again, I’m wrong.  According to the www.hellenion.org website, Metageitnion began on the 8th, not the 6th, although I hope someone familiar with Grecian months can explain why, because the new moon WAS on the 6th).  True, I could raise my hand on Day #1 of “Witchcraft for Dummies” (not the real title of the course I signed up for in New Hampshire – I just can’t remember it) and ask, “Hey!  How come Metageitnion began on the 8th, not the 6th, considering that the new moon WAS on the 6th??”  But no, I figured I’d wait just a wee bit longer before getting myself expelled for being annoying.

I have spent the last week wandering around the apartment, scoping out “circle sites”.  Nowhere can I find room for a 9-foot diameter circle, but a smaller one, possibly.  I do have my altar in the bedroom, but realized that perhaps I needed more room for spiritual activities as opposed to a focal point for feeble attempts at meditation.  Options are down to the living room and study.

And yet another illiterate witch set off the The Grammar and Spelling Psycho Police Squad.   This time I had looked up Pennyroyal to see if I could remember why I ordered it.  A dumb witch had decided to make anti-flea stuff to spray on the floor outside of her door.  Included in her directions was this piece of nonsense:

The Grammar and Spelling Psycho Police Squad

"Since the infusion is quite dark and heavy looking I deluded it with water."

???

You what?  You deluded it?  You gave it a delusion?  Your anti-flea concoction is now delusional?  Sure you didn't mean you DILUTED it?  Argh!!!   [Ker-blam!]  [Ker-pow!] [Ka-blooey!]  DILUTE, DILUTE, DILUTE!  OMG PLEASE. Buy a dictionary. 

I still haven’t figured out why I bought pennyroyal.  If anyone has a good use for it, let me know.